Jesus Christ

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Topics Started by Jesus Christ

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  8

  Appendixes suck

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  to all of you out there that think dad made us perfectly i'm here to say you're wrong.

  humans (and those of us who used to be human) have the most idiotic body part ever imagined called an appendix.

  you can be going along just like everything is normal and next thing you know you're being wheeled off to the operating room to have your appendix taken out.

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  14

  Pants/Arguing

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  back when i was a jw i had to wear pants when i was in public.

  i like being without pants but those pesky elders always made me wear pants.

  life would have been so much better for me had i been allowed to feel the breeze from not wearing pants.

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  9

  Finding Someone From a Long Time Ago

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, say someone was trying to find someone they once knew.

  what advice would you give them?

  its a woman who's since gotten married and divorced since the last time you talked to them back in the early/mid 90's and has also had a kid.

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  17

  Computer Graphics Question - Flash MX

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm hoping someone will be able to help me.

  yeah yeah, i'm perfect and should know everything but i just haven't been paying much attention with macromedia flash mx.. i've imported two images (.jpg's) to the stage and am wanting to do a nice fade between the two.

  i can do a kind of sloppy one if i change the brightness or tint to match the background and then tween to it.

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  4

  Electronic Gadgetry

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  over the past few days some people have been talking about various electronics and gadgets and other stuff like that.

  some of you have expressed interest in seeing what kind of stuff i have here and how my entertainment system works.

  well, its not perfect and has many areas that could be improved upon but its still pretty inventive if you ask me.

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  7

  Yet another JW contradiction

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, as if you all need another thing that that doesn't make sense but is typical jw thinking here goes.. they think dad only hears the prayers of the rightous and not the "bad" people.

  if you've done evil things dad won't listen to you.

  they also think that to be good with dad and me you have to confess your sins.

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  Funny Story

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, this story is about one of my earthly friends (not me because i'm up in heaven and everything) and can't help but laugh my ass off at it everytime i think of it.

  this guy is about as big of an apostate as you can possibly get.

  he was born and raised a jw but stopped going as soon as he possibly could and now just about everyone knows he's an apostate.

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  9

  Proven Miracle

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, i just got done talking to dad and he let me perform the whole "water into wine" miracle once again but instead its vodka this time.

  the photographic proof is here at this website.

  go to it and if you have faith you shall see that i am great.

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  6

  New Bible!

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is a quick note to say that dad and i are working on a new version of the bible.

  don't worry about the stuff that doesn't make sense in the old one, we wrote that while consuming the biggest bottle of vodka you could imagine.

  quite frankly, by the time we got to revelation we were smashed and don't even remember writing most of it.

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  53

  I'm back!!!!!

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  jesus here.

  i'm sure you've probably read a few books about me in the past or at least about my dad, god (or as everyone back home likes to call him "spanky").

  this is just a quick note to say that dad and i are back home now.

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